Post by ema2two on Mar 25, 2005 14:33:15 GMT -5
I have a cute story to share, that I realized was inspiring me to feel more committed to this weight management endeavor, and thought I would share it in hopes it helps some of you.
By way of introduction, I'm a mother of 4 small children. I am a lifetime member from 1989 who regained all my weight, and then some, and came back to WW in 5/2002 with nearly 100 lbs to lose. My 3rd child was about 18 months old when I came back. I told my DH I needed him to agree to watch the kids every Monday night for two years, so I could go to WW, as that was how long I expected it to take me to lose my weight. My motivation was all about my health, and I was pleasantly surprised when the improvements in my body were a side benefit. I realized my kids were noticing the changes in my eating and my body and I wanted to carefully frame the ways they thought about food, body image, self esteem and health. Especially with the images kids are bombarded with in todays popular culture. When my kids would ask me where I'd been, I'd say Weight Watchers. When they asked what that was, I said it was 'a healthy eating class.' My oldest, was then 6 and discovering computers, he'd help me journal my points on e-tools (flex was all there was back then).
I got my weight off much faster than 2 years, much to my surprise. I got to goal and pregnant with my 4th child the same week. I was delighted, but scared of losing control when I had to stop going to meetings, and when I hadn't yet adjusted to my thinner body or stabilized my eating patterns. It worked out fine, though losing my last 10 lbs of baby weight has been incredibly slow and mentally challenging as a result. My baby is 14 months old and I'm still not there yet.
Finally, the story:
Today is a Jewish holiday called Purim. It commemorates the events described in the Biblical Book of Esther. Among the religious obligations in celebrating the holiday is the requirement to give gifts of food to friends and neighbors. It's a weight watcher's nightmare, as everyone you know comes with a bag or basket of junk food, baked goods, candy and wine. Maybe a piece of fruit or a box of raisins thrown in if you're lucky.
Yesterday, my sons' school had a Purim food package exchange in the 1st grade. Each boy was to bring a package with two items. The teacher would draw names out of a hat to see who each boy would give his package to. I asked my son what he wanted to put in his package.
DS: "An ear of corn and an apple"
Me: "Oh. That's an interesting choice"
(Internal voice--Whoever get's his package is going to hate him. Everyone else will be getting candy and cookies. He'll be the laughingstock of the class and be teased.")
Ne: "Do you want to give an apple and a chocolate bar, or some chips" I bet all the boys like apples and will want some kind of treat for the holiday."
(Internal voice--Careful, this is a very mixed message you're sending)
DS: Why would I want to give them junk food? They are my friends, I want to give them healthy food like fruits and vegetables. I want them to be healthy.
Me: You're right. We want to give people healthy foods.
(PS In the morning when he was actually putting the food in the package, he opted for a dried fruit roll and a box of raisins)
My point here is that the kids hear how we conceptualize this weight management endeavor and how we respond to food-related experiences. My son had heard all the positive self-talk (OK, so I self-talk out loud sometimes) and believes it. I didn't realize how much of what I was doing they were noticing and integrating with their view of life.
I came back to WW for the sake of my own health. I saw that as a gift to myself, and also to my husband and children. I wanted to be healthy and live to see them grow up rather than dead of a heart attack or disabled by various awful complications of chronic disease. I thought at the start of this of my being alive and well as the big benefit to them of my being a WW. It might even be an even bigger benefit to them to have seen me model healthy attitudes and behaviors around food. Especially if they learn to emulate them.
This morning the Purim packages started arriving around 8 AM. The fighting over who got which candy bar from the first back started at 8:01. I gave them each a zip lock bag. I told them they could each have three candies for their bag. If they saw something that came later in the day in a package that they wanted, they could take one thing out of their ziploc bag and replace it, but there could never be more than three things in the bag. They loved the control and the ability to make choices, and hardly feel the limits. I'm so proud of myself for adapting the WW buffet strategy to this situation. Best of all, they aren't fighting over each bag that comes.
By way of introduction, I'm a mother of 4 small children. I am a lifetime member from 1989 who regained all my weight, and then some, and came back to WW in 5/2002 with nearly 100 lbs to lose. My 3rd child was about 18 months old when I came back. I told my DH I needed him to agree to watch the kids every Monday night for two years, so I could go to WW, as that was how long I expected it to take me to lose my weight. My motivation was all about my health, and I was pleasantly surprised when the improvements in my body were a side benefit. I realized my kids were noticing the changes in my eating and my body and I wanted to carefully frame the ways they thought about food, body image, self esteem and health. Especially with the images kids are bombarded with in todays popular culture. When my kids would ask me where I'd been, I'd say Weight Watchers. When they asked what that was, I said it was 'a healthy eating class.' My oldest, was then 6 and discovering computers, he'd help me journal my points on e-tools (flex was all there was back then).
I got my weight off much faster than 2 years, much to my surprise. I got to goal and pregnant with my 4th child the same week. I was delighted, but scared of losing control when I had to stop going to meetings, and when I hadn't yet adjusted to my thinner body or stabilized my eating patterns. It worked out fine, though losing my last 10 lbs of baby weight has been incredibly slow and mentally challenging as a result. My baby is 14 months old and I'm still not there yet.
Finally, the story:
Today is a Jewish holiday called Purim. It commemorates the events described in the Biblical Book of Esther. Among the religious obligations in celebrating the holiday is the requirement to give gifts of food to friends and neighbors. It's a weight watcher's nightmare, as everyone you know comes with a bag or basket of junk food, baked goods, candy and wine. Maybe a piece of fruit or a box of raisins thrown in if you're lucky.
Yesterday, my sons' school had a Purim food package exchange in the 1st grade. Each boy was to bring a package with two items. The teacher would draw names out of a hat to see who each boy would give his package to. I asked my son what he wanted to put in his package.
DS: "An ear of corn and an apple"
Me: "Oh. That's an interesting choice"
(Internal voice--Whoever get's his package is going to hate him. Everyone else will be getting candy and cookies. He'll be the laughingstock of the class and be teased.")
Ne: "Do you want to give an apple and a chocolate bar, or some chips" I bet all the boys like apples and will want some kind of treat for the holiday."
(Internal voice--Careful, this is a very mixed message you're sending)
DS: Why would I want to give them junk food? They are my friends, I want to give them healthy food like fruits and vegetables. I want them to be healthy.
Me: You're right. We want to give people healthy foods.
(PS In the morning when he was actually putting the food in the package, he opted for a dried fruit roll and a box of raisins)
My point here is that the kids hear how we conceptualize this weight management endeavor and how we respond to food-related experiences. My son had heard all the positive self-talk (OK, so I self-talk out loud sometimes) and believes it. I didn't realize how much of what I was doing they were noticing and integrating with their view of life.
I came back to WW for the sake of my own health. I saw that as a gift to myself, and also to my husband and children. I wanted to be healthy and live to see them grow up rather than dead of a heart attack or disabled by various awful complications of chronic disease. I thought at the start of this of my being alive and well as the big benefit to them of my being a WW. It might even be an even bigger benefit to them to have seen me model healthy attitudes and behaviors around food. Especially if they learn to emulate them.
This morning the Purim packages started arriving around 8 AM. The fighting over who got which candy bar from the first back started at 8:01. I gave them each a zip lock bag. I told them they could each have three candies for their bag. If they saw something that came later in the day in a package that they wanted, they could take one thing out of their ziploc bag and replace it, but there could never be more than three things in the bag. They loved the control and the ability to make choices, and hardly feel the limits. I'm so proud of myself for adapting the WW buffet strategy to this situation. Best of all, they aren't fighting over each bag that comes.
